2008 is gone and here comes 2009..
I wouldn't know how to classify 2008 as..
Like any other years, it has its ups and downs..
This would be my last entry for this blog and also the longest. I've mentioned to Azack before that it would be my most honest entry to mark the end of 2008 and a new beginning to 2009. So, here goes nothing... and do bear in mind, its just how I feel..
WORK...
I was gievn the opportunity to assume the role of CSM, and work load has been demanding ever since.It has taken a toll on me physically, mentally and emotionally. I took over at the worst time possible. 7 part-timers were quitting and the festive seasons were around the corner, Hari Raya and Deepavali i think. It was hard to get the ball rolling when you basically have to start from scratch. The festive seasons didn't help too. Staffs were on leave and things were moving at a slow speed.
Impressions have to be established and expectations have to met. Now, I am on my toes more than ever after learning how my bosses operate. There were some high points when the bosses recognises your potential but there was also some low points, when mistakes were made and at that point of time, it seemed irreversible.
Great power comes great responsibilities. Once, I had to send out 4 apology letters in a week. So, if anyone requires anyone to write an apology letter, you know who to look for. I've become some what of an expert in that area.. haha..
Have I ever mentioned that I just dislike the working hours! 9am-8pm... Haiz.. It just sucks!! I do not have time for myself, family and friends. Every single day, I would be complaining abt how tired and exhausted I am. At the end of the day, I would just feel so drained out and exhausted.
There is only one thing that keeps me going to work everyday; my colleagues. I just love them all to bits! Yes, they can be the poisons who are killing me softly when they committed mistakes but they are also my antidote, constantly providing me with laughters. There are 26 staffs in Rainbow, and only 6 are full-timers. I always says that Rainbow runs on the energy that the part-timer provide.
Words like 'grinding', 'please ah, please ah' and 'bo-boss' have become Rainbow's trademark. I was pretty sad when Faizal, Sherman and Azri left. There were the 'backbone' to all the fun and laughters. I fed on their jokes and incessant nonsense to keep me going every day. Our trip home would always be a new adventure; posing with Barney in the middle of a crowded train, opening up the umbrella at the mrt station and not forgetting, constant cam-whoring no matter where we were, even while crossing the roads. Haizz.... I miss the boys and our trip home....
Through work too, I've made amazing friends. Hidayah, my listening ear, gossip and whinning buddy. I dun think I would be able to survive this long without her encouragement. I truly do hope we would be able to fulfil our plans in the near future. Not forgetting, a particular someone who turns out to be a really good friend when I needed a shoulder to cry on. It kinda surprises me when I actually broke down in front of him. It is sad when an outsider is able to understand you more than someone whom you truly cares. I thank him for being a good friend without asking anything in return.
FAMILY.
For the first time ever, I was left all alone, parentless for the longest time ever! Both parents left for Hajj in Nov for a month. I am not embarrass to say that I cried like a baby when mummy left me at the airport. I've never been separated from mummy that long!!! Every single day I would wait unpatiently for her to call. And when she did call, I would ended up crying just cos she cried first.. hehe..
Nonetheless, it was a time when I began to appreciate my family more. My uncle, aunt and cousins were hovering over me like I was some precious-only-heir-to-the-throne princess in some Kingdom of Teban. I used to report strength to only mummy, but with mummy away, I had to report strength to 4 person!! When I spent too much time at cousin's place, my uncle would call to check on when would I be sleeping over at his place. When I was at my uncle's place, my cousins would be calling to check on when would I be returning to their place. For that period of a mth, I have 3 homes; Teban, Bukit Batok and Toa Payoh.
I truly thank my uncle's family for providing me with such caring hospitality and it made me appreciate them even more. As I an only child, they are all I've got next to my parents.
Being parent-less for a mth, I've learnt to look after myself and at the same time appreciate every little thing my mum does for me even more. Mummy, I promised to spend more time at home and be a better daughter! =)
Beginning of the year, I was struggling to move on from my grandpa's passing. It got better as the months passed by but I have yet to step foot at the cemetery. I still do miss him and when I visited my grandaunt, I couldnt help but teared up a lil cos she just reminded me of him. For this year, I hope to gather enough strength to visit him again......
FRIENDSHIP
I truly thank God that I am blessed with really good pple as my bestfriends.
At the beginning of the year, a certain friendship took a backseat but I am thankful that my besfriend is a bigger person than I am and was ready to accept me with no reservations. I am glad that we managed to spent more time with each other and I am truly sorry if I've hurt your feelings along the way. Mrs Rain, I really do love you to bits!! (with no lesbian tendency here). Hopefully we can meet soon for another session of karaoke and flood the playlist!!!
I was having quite a difficult year end and the pple that matters most, my bestfriends were there for me. Thanx Red, for tirelessly lending me the listening ear and even though you are a dedicated disciple of David Copperfield, I know you do care. Thanx for trying to knock some sense into me even when it seemed useless. =)
And Zal, thanx for being a part of Rainbow! I am truly glad to have u as my colleague and good friend. I dun think you've realise that by having you in Rainbow had actually made me less tense and stressful at work. Your constant "Its OKAY, Lina!" does act like a motivation for me. And would you and Kamie get married already?!! Please ah!!! Please ah!!!
On 21st Dec, my childhood bestfriend of 18years, Marliza was finally married!! We've always predicted that she wld be the first to be married and it came true! I am truly happy for her and hopefully both she and her hubby love our prezzie.. ahem ahem.... *grinning cheekily*
Pple at work too have transformed from being colleagues to friends. I've began to spend more time with them and learnt more about each other. We've begun to spend more time outside of work and just hung out till late. Friends like Nas, Ferhan and Suhaimi constantly have things up their sleeves that I can't keep up with their surprises and antics. Thanx guys for trying to cheer me up and providing some entertainment!
RELATIONSHIP.
Hmmm.. where do i start??
I finally understood how it felt like to have my heart broken.
Disappointed and hurt would be the 2 best word to describe how I felt..
My closest friends would know that I do not fall in and out of love easily.
And I am not a vengeful person who keeps it to heart, what more if I still do care for the person.. Someone said I am just too soft-hearted and forgiving. Perhaps to some, hate is the way to go for healing but I chose otherwise. Besides, how do you hate someone you care? I chose to be friends and even though it is hard, at least it offers some comfort to me in some way..
Well.... The wound might have healed but the scar may not be completely gone..
Whenever I thought I am over it, certain songs/places/shows would spark sthg and as much as I try not to, I would tear up.... like now... *okie, happy thoughts!*
I know some friends have really good intentions, but I dun think I am ready yet.. I need some time to recover.. :)
And the recovery process proved to be very costly for me!!. I still cant believe that I spent $2k in a span of 1mth, keeping in mind this was before the Dec bonus.. I cant stop buying things!
FIRST(S)
I would summarise 2008 to have many firsts for me...
First time given the opportunity to run my own branch.
First time being parentless for the longest time ever.
First time sleeping alone in my house.
First time doing something naughty while parents were away.. *grinning cheekily*
First time being a bridesmaid twice for best pals, Hidayah and Marliza.
First time going Karaoke in S'pore ever!
First time hanging out with the guys at the Cage and supper-ed till 3am..
First time being Head Coach for a football team!! Muahaha... more like sabo-ed into being Head Coach for the Income team.
First time meeting Nazri Nasir, Lim Thong Hai and Sundram!! Muahaha... I cant believe I was still in awe of the ex-Lions...
And first time had me heart broken... oh well.... which led to my...............................................
First time spending more than $1k on a bag!!! (without much coercion fr Azack.. hahaha)
2008 has been quite a trying year for me, in terms of work and personal life. Nonetheless, each year has its lesson to be learned. I hope every experiences that I went through has made me a wiser and better person, not only for myself but the pple ard me. Like they say, "What does not kill you, only makes you stronger!"
I think I will deifinitely miss this blog of mine, lotsa memories written over the years...
Hopefully, new memories would be made too...